Saturday, July 26, 2008
You noe, i actaully regretted ponning the last training for polo. But its like, i hav alot to say, to my juniors, to my batchmates, to my coach. I really treasured them and actually treasured them but at the same time disliked them. Again, im back to having conflicting feelings. Just like Junkiat and Sixuan did, I would outline my whole ep3 life:
Sec 1:
It was mainly a delima for me. I couldn't decide whether to join gym, polo or back to badminton. I had conflicts for the first three month. Thus wasting off my time, trying to find my directions. But i was really motivated when I saw my grand senior "samuel", having able to get pass 3-4 man at 1 go, I found something I can aim for. It was then I decided I should drop gym and go for polo at the same time holding onto badminton. But this was precisely why I couldn't concentrate on it. Think about this, you hav just won the 3rd in nationals and u want to giv up ur position for an entirely new sport which u hav disadvantage in? Neh. So even as I held both, I still managed to train.
But the time when I grew really strong wasn't until the nationals swimming competition. I got 10th for breast stroke, aka missing the finals by 0.13 sec. I was like wtf. Den my team scolded me, and said that I should just quit cause I'm just to short and there's nth I could do. I got pissed. But it was then I started to train OT. I was the only 1 left after 6 training til 7. My coach would watch me swim laps after every1 had left. Even when everybody stopped for break to concentrate on studies, I continued. Then, by the end of the first yr, I had alr proven my worth as a vice captain, playing the most important role in the game : center.
Yr 2:
This yr was really bad for me. But nevetheless, the strenght I gained in the first year helped me through. In the first half before the competition, we were owning our sec 3 seniors. But that said, we were the underdogs in the competition. The best thing was I was down with very bad fever on the weekend before the competition. I regained my form only after the 2nd match, which help through til the finals. We emerged champions without losing a single match. But the sad things came right after the competition. I was not chosen for combined schools, although I was scoring half of the team goals. I injured my back very badly during the quater finals of my badminton competition, and had to stop training for weeks. My TIC tot I was faking, started to pick on me, and I completely lost intrest in the sport. My injury left me very weak, and has not healed til today. Everytime I wanted to train, I would get pain in my back, so regularly, that everytime I asked to rest, they would make fun saying that my back is too pain... I came late for all the trainings and skipped trainings as much as possible. This proved to be a problem for me the next year.
Year 3:
Yeah, due to my bad conduct, I was not considered for the team this year. I was first very happy, cause i can skip more trainings. But I got really grateful cause my entire 'b' div team petitioned for me to get in the team. Although I eventually got in, I wasn't really motivated anymore. I couldn't push myself to get into trainings, and I couldn't play to my best abilities. It was another dissapointment. But nevertheless, I acted as a morale boost to my team. I changed from playing in the center to playing at the perimeters. I was the only man to drive everytime we attack, keeping our attack alive. And during the nationals bronze playoff, I managed to get our team back in shape by scoring from the corner, which had no angle. Yeah. But again, I wasn't chosen for the combine school. I got really sick of it and became even more slack. After hearing that my coach is leaving at the end of the year, I got even more upset, cause the next year is our best yr to break the 'b' div drought with both the sec 3s and the sec 4s winning gold. But he still left...
Year 4:
We got a saddistic new coach. I totally disgreed with his trainings, his instructions and the way he coaches. I didn't wanna train under him. I didn't wanna do the things he asked cause I felt it wasn't logical. I couldn't see the things he wanted. I had no creative freedom in the game like I had before. He considered me as a noob, with lousy judgement, no skills, cannot shoot, not a team player, which I totally don't agree. I passed most of the through shots, and made most of the counter attacks. It was because of his stupid strategies that I had to be tied down to my man. Our keeper is just letting in every goal from every angle and he blames it on us. WTF man. He is a coach who deserves no respect from me. Imagine being asked to pump 100 within 3 mins. WTF. Anyway, I din expect him to choose me for the team. THe only thing I helped me, was teaching me that you have to trust your team. It wasn't until then when I could play to my fullest potential again. In the last RI match, I managed to help with both the attack and the defense, securing the bronze.
Now, i really start to recall these precious memories. I really feel like crying. But they just won't do. I hav nv cried in 4 years already. I miss my tears. And you should really try not crying out. Its much worst. Is there any1 who can teach me how to cry?
In my own world,
9:02 AM
